Someone can love you deeply, but if they don’t have the emotional skills to care for the relationship, it will be a rough road. – Yung Pueblo
In families we tend to do what we do because it is what we have always done – even when it is not working. When you break it down, reciprocity is basic. I initiate, you respond. You initiate, I respond. We all contribute in some way or another to family gatherings. More importantly, we work at just being there for one another. We show interest in each other’s lives. We try to connect deeply. But what if your family’s connection style is more like trying to get water from an empty well? To a request for more connection from my family, I received this reply: “Why do we need to keep in touch? You can see what we’re doing on social media.” In this case, the rules of engagement have been clearly established and reciprocity of effort is not a priority.