In order to get to a healthier and more productive place, we need to give up our fear of conflict, turmoil and resistance. –John Gottman Sometimes we must fight for the relationship we want.  Saying, “I prefer to choose my battles” is a way of avoiding conflict. An argument may…

While you’ll feel compelled to charge forward it’s often a gentle step back that will reveal to you where you and what you truly seek. ―Rasheed Ogunlaru Do not confuse doing nothing with passivity. There is power in not responding and moments where silence is truly golden. When it looks…

Do NothingCommunicateLeave When it is time to address issues in your relationship, your options come down to the three potential solutions: do nothing, communicate or leave. Stretch yourself. If you normally do nothing, communicate. If you are the type to cut and run, sit still. If you are one to…

Reciprocity: Do I show appreciation? Do I nurture this relationship?Reliability: Can my partner count on me? Do I do what I say I will do?Respect: Do I treat my partner with the respect they deserve?Passion: Do I do my part in keeping sexual or shared passions going?Intimacy: Can I vulnerable…

Romantic relationships can range from “chaste courting”, “just dating”, “friends with benefits”, “booty calls”, being an “item”, “living with” to long term committed and/or married. How would you describe yours at this point? Then assess based on the six essentials: reciprocity, reliability, respect, passion, intimacy, and commitment. You might decide this…

I wish the pain of betrayal was as easy to ignore as the red flags that forewarned of it. ―Steve Maraboli This is a good place to stop and assess your relationship. Be brutally honest. What is working? What is not working? (What about bringing your flag display on dates? Just kidding….

Reciprocity: Is your partner willing and able to put the work into nurturing the relationship? Reliability: Do they say what they are going to do and then do it? Do you feel secure? Respect: Can you be yourself? Do you feel emotionally and physically safe? Do you feel valued? Passion:…

I hope we’ll get lucky enough to grow old together.  — Paula Mclain Commitment is not about the formal ceremony. It is an emotional investment in your future together. I believe it begins when your toothbrushes start sharing the same holder. It is a frame of mind and if it…

Intimacy is not purely physical. It’s the act of connecting with someone so deeply, you feel like you can see into their soul. ―Reshall Varsos t is a classic couple’s issue. One wants to just be heard, the other wants to fix the problem. Learn to say:  “I don’t need you to fix this,…

Don’t pass up a chance by dumping someone after a first date because you don’t feel the fireworks. The fireworks can happen at any time and be maintained. –Helen Fisher Passion involves feelings and desires that lead to physical attraction, romance, and sexual consummation. After the initial fireworks, it can morph into…