Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer. –Ed Cunningham
Reciprocity of effort in friendship is basic. I initiate, you respond. You initiate, I respond. We take turns scheduling, planning, driving, hosting, buying, bringing, and sharing. We also take turns talking and listening and just being there. We try to connect regularly, ideally in real time. We share a meal or a walk as well as our troubles and our joys. It is special on a unique level that is not to be confused with social media acquaintances. When a friendship starts fading, the first place you will often notice it is reciprocity. They stop initiating. They slow down or stop responding. Or they make excuses. They cancel. If, after you have reached out for a connection three times with limited or no response, stop initiating. They may realize they have been neglecting the friendship and reach out. Or not.